Friday, February 29, 2008

Broken

(this was written the other day, but didn't want to post it yet)

I really hope it's either just the hormone thing, or the weather...but I feel broken. My body , my mind my soul.

I hate to be one of "those people" who have nothing nice to say, but I know I am. I feel guilty for robbing my kids of a happy mommy.

I really don't care to talk to anyone as I don't have anything nice to say.

I'm unhappy and don't know how to get happy.

I really don't remember the last time I was.

I do know part of it is just being over whelmed. Part of brain tells me to go back to work, but really I can't. With hubby's new job, and business and all his commitments how can I? I don't want to put the babysitting v on the other two. Then the house work...I would loose it even more if I had to work all day and then come home to the reg crap...makes me shudder to think of it.

I really don't expect much, I am understanding and realize that when hubby gets home from working and meetings and what ever he doesn't want to help out, but I can't help getting fustated as I feel like my life is one step short of being a maid. I am so sick of my house and the clutter and the unfixed stuff, I am so sick of him not wanting to have things fixed. I'm angry and fed up and really understand who women walk away from their families....not forever but man I need some days to regenerate.

I know I just need to suck it up but I really need my husband to understand me right now and be there for me too. It's not easy being in the house day after day and have no one appreciate what you do...hello welcome to being a mom I know!

1 comment:

Sign of the Times said...

Sorry I never read this when you posted it...even if Iwould have I do not know if I would have responded...just not sure..

I would have now!!!!